Everyone is Delusional

I was having a conversation with my eldest son recently about an upcoming state mandated test he’d just found out about. 

He had ALL of the questions. What was the test on, how much time would he have, what should he study, who was going to be there, did he have to go somewhere or would it be from home… all of the things.

I fully support all questions but there was one question I didn’t immediately have an answer to because I hadn’t looked it up and that was what subject the test would be on. 

That is when the drama started.

Backstory

I suppose it would be helpful to provide a tiny bit of backstory before I continue. I homeschool both of my children but I don’t do it in a normal way and it’s completely different for each of them. 

For my eldest, he’s enrolled in a virtual high school which means he has teachers and homework and all of the things. However, because he has very specific executive functioning issues I am heavily involved with the organization and execution of those classes. 

Other cool things; he LOVES English, likes most of his other classes, and has decided that math is hard. 

Because I’m an expert in curriculum and instruction I understand that the reason he finds math challenging is not because he’s struggling with the math part but the executive functioning part of math. He’s actually quite good at math (unlike his mother who has a learning disability in math - I can set that nonsense up all day and never get a problem right).

Anyway.

Mom, you’re delusional.

Back to the story. I was telling him on a Friday that he had this test on Monday and within 90 seconds he’d decided it was a math test and he was going to fail and it wasn’t fair that they didn’t tell him sooner and his life was over.

So much drama.

I reminded him he didn’t know it was a math test, that he was quite good in math, and he had been studying math for a decade now and why not just believe it was going to be easy for him and he’d do great.

To which he responded, “Mom, you’re delusional. You don’t know that’s going to happen.”

Alright, cupcake. Let’s dance. 

Now, most of you won’t know this about me but if I call you cupcake or princess I’m about to make you rethink all of your life choices. 

I can hear my podcast editor and one of my best friends laughing hysterically in my head as she hears this for the first time because she knows. She’s probably also a little worried for his safety because I can be a bit wicked at times.

Don’t worry my loves, I went easy on him.

Whenever we imagine the future we are being delusional because a delusion is a false belief about reality. Of course, we don’t actually know for sure with one hundred percent certainty what the future will hold. Not even with astrology. 

So when we worry or daydream about the future we are being delusional.

Since we all do it to some extent, isn’t it cool to be conscious of it and decide if we want our delusion to lean fairytale or nightmare?

Fairytale or Nightmare

I asked him why he didn’t want to imagine a future where it went well and he enjoyed the experience and he explained to me (like I was a slow and also a toddler) that it would be so much worse when that’s not what happened.

Ohhhh. I see.

So I asked,  “You’d rather imagine how bad it could be because you don’t want to be disappointed and upset?”

He responded with, “Exactly!” with a tone that implied that was obvious and he was proud of me for understanding rain was wet or something similar.

Then I pointed out that instead of being disappointed and upset in 48 hours, he’d decided to be both of those for the entire time between now and then and potentially after the exam as well and asked, “Which delusion sounds better the one where you’re happy up until you’re not or the one that makes you unhappy the whole time?”

Checkmate, princess.

I didn’t actually call him cupcake or princess but the looks I got were the same as if I had, I assure you.

He hates logic traps but he also loves them and he’s been subjected to my brain for his entire life so he kind of hears it in my voice when I’m setting a trap.

He just looked at me and said he hated when I use logic against him and didn’t say anything else about it for a few hours.

Your Choice

The thing about anxiety and daydreaming is they are different sides of the same coin. Neither is going to save you from suffering in reality at a later point. 

Worrying ahead of time won’t make something you don’t want to experience subjectively easier and thinking it will go well won’t make it hurt more if it doesn’t. 

The only thing that will change how you feel is your thoughts about the event after it occurs and your resistance to feeling any emotions that come up. I promise. 

You get to decide in each and every moment how you want to think about literally everything. Sure that might be delusional but you’re already doing it so why not do it for your own benefit? 

In case you’re wondering what happened with my eldest…

A few hours later just before bed he said maybe it’ll be an English test and I said yup how does that feel? He decided that would be much better and he only needed a little more coaching on it the rest of the weekend. 

Monday rolled around and it was a reading test that had massive tech issues which were super stressful for him. So he got the kind of test he wanted and it was still subjectively unpleasant for him. 

Getting him through that required a different kind of coaching but he finished the test and the grades will be available at some point in the future. 

After the test he asked, “What if I failed?”

I responded with, “What if you did really well?”

He said, “That would mean I’m amazing!”

Nope. He’s amazing either way. 

All it would mean is he got a grade which is neutral just like if he fails it just means he got a grade. 

But that’s a different podcast.

If you loved this content and you’d like to learn more about working with your thoughts and astrology, you should join the Crusade where I teach you how to work with the Moon and your thoughts to create a life you love.

Until next time, my wish for you is an imagination that works for you instead of against you.