Subjective Vs. Objective

These are two words I use a LOT when coaching and when talking about astrology so I want to spend a little time going over what they mean in general and in the context of coaching, astrology, fate, and free will. 

If you haven’t listened to Episode 32 “Coaching at the Crossroads” yet, I suggest going back and giving it a listen for a better understanding of how I use the terms fate and free will.

Alrighty.

Subjective means that something is based on or influenced by personal feelings. It’s your opinion.

Objective means that something is based on facts and not influenced by opinion - in theory anyway. 

I will add the caveat that we accept certain things to be objectively true because the data that we have supports that point of view at a given moment in history but that later it may be revealed to be incorrect. 

Subjectivity of Astronomy

Let’s take astronomy as an example.

For thousands of years, it was objectively true that the Earth was the center of the universe. This is known as a geocentric model. This was the basis of philosophy, science, religion, and even reality and it was a BIG deal.

It wasn’t challenged until 1543 when Copernicus said, “NOPE, the Sun is clearly the center of the universe and we’re rocking around it in a circular orbit.” Then in 1605, Kepler introduced The First Law of Planetary Motion, which says planets move in ellipses with the Sun at the center. 

When I tell you people weren’t happy with these ideas, it’s a bit of an understatement.

Even when Galileo defended heliocentricism, most of the highly educated people of the time were like, “Nah dude, clearly the Aristotelian geocentric model is real and you’re just crazy pants.” 

Why did they do this in the face of new evidence? Because they stopped being objective observers and let their subjective feelings about religion and what they thought they knew of reality to interfere. 

So, if this can happen with the most intelligent people of an entire era, trust when I say our subjective views mess with our perception of objective reality. Not even because we want them to but because people genuinely believe that their subjective experience IS reality. 

This happens with facts and science allllll the time.

Which is why we can’t get attached to facts being true. Crazy, right? Facts are just what we know to be true in any given moment… are you with me?

Why Subjective and Objective Matter

Ok.

Now that we’ve established that subjective means it’s essentially your opinion and objective is something we all agree on as currently being factual but which is in fact still subjective… let’s continue.

An example of a fact (one of those objective things) would be: It is raining. 

A subjective statement regarding that fact might be: It’s gloomy and wet.

Let’s do another example:

Objective: The dishes are in the sink.

Subjective: My husband didn’t wash the dishes again.

This is subjective because it implies several things. First, that he should done have the dishes and second, that they shouldn’t be in the sink. The only fact is that there are dishes in the sink. That’s neutral and it’s also a good way to tell if you’ve let any subjective opinions creep into your supposedly objective statements.

This matters a lot in coaching because the stories we tell ourselves about our experiences directly impact the way we feel about them. If I’m thinking someone should have done something or that they should not have, then I’m more likely to feel a subjectively negative emotion (which, by the way, is totally fine, maybe you want to be angry or sad about some things).

But the goal of coaching, at least if I’m coaching you, is to help you see that you’re in complete control of how you experience reality, which means being really clear on what the objective facts are so that you have control over your subjective experience.

In astrology, this becomes relevant when people talk about malefic (aka known as mean) planets or hard aspects (like an opposition or square). Objectively, none of the planets are bad and none of the aspects are hard. They’re doing what they’re supposed to do and putting them on this evil temple of doom as being something scary just sets you up to have a subjectively worse experience. 

If you really embrace the idea that all the different parts of life are just what they are (an apple is an apple is objective) and you can experience it subjectively however you want. For example, you could tell yourself the story that apples are amazing because of apple pie or you could be team “kill the witch” because of Snow White and Eve. It could really go either way. 

I know that was a lot. I do, I get it. So much so, that I’ll probably go over it again and again and again until you’re like my son and will auto-correct yourself when you state something as true that is clearly subjective. 

A recent example goes something like him saying I’m grumpy and me looking at him and him correcting to “my brain subjectively thinks your tone and choice of words mean you’re mad at me” to which I can reply “I’m not mad at you, I love you. My brain subjectively thinks your failure to follow instructions the first time given means you aren’t listening and I need to use a different tone and words to get the results I want.” 

Yes, I AM always this much fun.

On the upside, this usually ends with everyone calmer and on the same page.

So tell me... 

What were you sure was an objective fact before this little mini-lesson that you now realize is your subjective experience or thought?

If you’re feeling frisky, hit me up on Instagram and share your answer with me.

Until next time, my wish for you is a subjective experience you love of the  objective circumstances that make up your subjective reality. 

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License:  Rustic Ballad by Alexander Nakarada