Wicked Veracity Podcast Show Notes | Episode 15

If you’re like most people, you probably like to think that everything in your life is up to you. This is completely natural and a product of the philosophical construct often referred to as free will which has endured for the past two millennia. I’m not here to debate the veracity of this philosophy (not today anyway), I’m just laying the conceptual foundation for today’s conversation.

You see, a lot of people take this notion of free will to mean that literally everything that happens to you is because of something you did which can lead to a lot of shame and self-loathing if you’ve had anything other than a Disney World experience of life.

Invisible String

I really like the concept of fate and I’m currently nerding out on the concepts of determinism and freedom in Stoic philosophy. While this episode is also not going to be specifically about those concepts, it’s important to understand that just because the concept of free will is now a thought a lot of people are accepting as reality - it’s just a theory and a theory is just a thought.

With that in mind, I want to explore a different thought for a moment by briefly talking about ancient mythology.

The Moirai were the trio of Greek goddesses that oversaw the fate of each individual. Instead of using their Greek or Latin names, I’m going to use their English equivalents as they give a hint to the function of each.  The first of the three goddesses was the Spinner. She spun the invisible string that was the fate of the entire cosmos. The Allotter then dispensed portions of the string to each human. The Inflexible would cut each individual’s invisible string, thus determining the moment of their death. 

So now we have the two extremes. On one hand, it’s all up to you and it’s totally your fault if bad things happen to you and on the other hand, we have the idea that nothing at all is up to you. 

No Compasses

I’d like to suggest setting aside the philosophical and theological implications of accepting or disputing a doctrine of free will or determinism for the moment and focus on what is for sure within your control - regardless of whether or not you adhere to the philosophy of free will or determinism or you’re an eclectic philosopher and you like to mix the two. 

Let’s say for the sake of this demonstration that free will exists and there are no compasses with which you can plot the course of your life. Even if that’s true, it still doesn’t mean everything is up to you. 

For example, someone you love dying of old age. There was nothing you could do to prevent the death. Your will could not be successfully exerted to accomplish immortality (and neither could theirs). 

But what you can use that free will for is to change your experience of their death or your own. 

Now let’s say that determinism is the true model of reality and that nothing that happens to you is up to you. They were always going to get hit by lightning - whether it was because you went outside with them during a storm or you both stayed inside chatting by the fireplace and a random bolt came in through a nearby window. 

You still have the choice of how you respond.

Healing Me Fine

Being devastated (or not) by the loss of someone is a choice you get to make.

Let’s say you want to be devastated and grieve the loss of this important person because that experience is important to you. That’s perfect and you can do that. You can embrace the perfection of that choice for you and not make it mean anything else about you as you process that emotion.

But you can also choose to make the circumstance of their death mean that you want to take the time to celebrate their life and the time you had with them. You don’t have to make it mean anything else that they’re no longer physically with you. 

Thread of Gold

Whether you believe your life is tied to other individuals and events with single threads of gold or you believe that everything that happens is up to you is kind of irrelevant in the face of the far more important truth.

The way you experience everything that happens to you, whether by fate or free will, is completely up to you. And that right there is the secret to life.

Music Time

Today’s episode is inspired by the song Invisible String by Taylor Swift.

Time, curious time

Gave me no compasses, gave me no signs

Were there clues I didn't see?

And isn't it just so pretty to think

All along there was some

Invisible string

Tying you to me?

So tell me... 

How do you want to experience your life? What would happen if you always accepted reality exactly as it was without wishing for it to be different? What if every single thing in your life was ultimately a string pulling you to where you are and every event in the future is perfect for getting you to where you need to be? How would that change your subjective experience of everything that has or will ever happen to you?

Spend time with these questions and see what comes up. If you’re feeling frisky, hit me up on Instagram and share your answers with me. If you want help choosing new thoughts, I’d love to work with you. You can contact me at www.wickedveracity.com/consult 

Until next time, my wish for you is that you find a single thread of gold to hold on to.